Quite possibly the worst film I've seen all year.
It may just edge out The Happening.
Right, where to start with this horrendous mess of plot holes, bad, bad acting and truly abysmal script writing?
St. Trinian's is obviously not going to be the sort of film I was ever going to like. However I even surprised myself for my level of disdain for it upon the closing credits (I'm surprised most of them wanted their names on there). It revolves around the story of a school overrun by, well, bitches who think it's be totally awesome (and, indeed, remotely possible) to take control of it and create what can only be described as a lewd haven for gils of all ages. This leads me to my first major problem with the film. I highly doubt anyone over the age of 15 would have enjoyed this film or taken lessons away from it. However, the younger generation upon watching this may very well see these sorry excuses for performances as great role-models, imitating their incredulously BBFC-approved (for a 12A!) phone-sex excapades and drug use. Nice one, guys.
The message is so horrendously warped I find it hard to believe how ANYONE could take anything positive away from this film, as the final message seems to be "do whatever the hell you want, it'll all work out in the end as long as you're willing to go to extreme lengths and perform unbelieveable illegalities." Fuck off. Children, go see Wall-E. A 2" bin-man robot incapable of speech can act better than these girls, an you'll get a much more wholesome film (and indeed, just generally better) as a matter of fact, kids, go see Saw instead of this film, do anything but watch this steaming pile of... shite!
How this is the film that launched Gemma Arterton's career I'll never know, the girl's a talented actress and I'm sure she'll do well in Quantum Of Solace. But St. Trinian's will forever be on her record, a black mark on this young actress' repertoire.
St Trinian's, you have poisoned the face of British Cinema for Winter 2007/08. I hope never to encounter you again.
Rating: -/*****
Sequel: In pre-production, I'm contemplating suicide.
Best Bit: Stephen Fry
The message is so horrendously warped I find it hard to believe how ANYONE could take anything positive away from this film, as the final message seems to be "do whatever the hell you want, it'll all work out in the end as long as you're willing to go to extreme lengths and perform unbelieveable illegalities." Fuck off. Children, go see Wall-E. A 2" bin-man robot incapable of speech can act better than these girls, an you'll get a much more wholesome film (and indeed, just generally better) as a matter of fact, kids, go see Saw instead of this film, do anything but watch this steaming pile of... shite!
How this is the film that launched Gemma Arterton's career I'll never know, the girl's a talented actress and I'm sure she'll do well in Quantum Of Solace. But St. Trinian's will forever be on her record, a black mark on this young actress' repertoire.
St Trinian's, you have poisoned the face of British Cinema for Winter 2007/08. I hope never to encounter you again.
Rating: -/*****
Sequel: In pre-production, I'm contemplating suicide.
Best Bit: Stephen Fry
share on: facebook
0 comments:
Post a Comment